- Melman: No, no that's not it. Listen Mototo, you'd better treat this lady like a queen. Because you, you my friend... have found the perfect woman. If I was ever so lucky to find the perfect woman, I would give her flowers every day. And not just any flowers, okay? Her favorites are orchids. White. And I would bring her breakfast every day. Six loaves of wheat bread with butter on both sides. No crusts. Just the way she likes it. I'd be her shoulder to cry on and her best friend. And I'd spend every day thinking of ways to make her laugh. She has the most... amazing laugh. That's what I would do, if I were you. But I'm not. So you do it.
- Moto Moto: Uhhh... What? Aaaanyways, where were we?
- Gloria: [sigh] I'm huge?
- [Bulb on the fuel guage is flashing]
- Kowalski: Skipper, look.
- Skipper: Analysis
- Kowalski: It looks like a small incandescent bulb, designed to indicate something out of the ordinary, like a malfunction.
- Skipper: I find it pretty and somewhat hypnotic.
- Kowalski: That too, sir.
- Skipper: Right. Rico, maunal!
- [Catches the manual and smashes the bulb with it]
- Skipper: Problemo solved.
- Kowalski: Sir, we may be out of fuel.
- Skipper: What makes you think that?
- Kowalski: We've lost engine one, and engine two is no longer on fire.
- Skipper: Buckle up, boys. Don't look, doll, this might get hairy.
- [on the microphone]
- Skipper: This is your captain speaking. I have good news and bad news. The good news is that we will be landing immediately.
- [everyone claps]
- Skipper: The bad news is, we're crash landing.
- [Plane goes on a dive]
- Skipper: When it comes to air travel, we know that you have no choice whatsoever, but thanks again for choosing Air Penguin.
- Private: In case of a loss of oxygen, please place your masks over your faces to hide your terrified expressions from the other passengers.
- Alex: Marty, it looks like this is it! I just want you to know, you're a one in a million friend!
- Marty: Thanks, Alex! You are a true friend!
- Alex: And I'm sure you won't mind when I tell you...
- Marty: What? Tell me what?
- Alex: I broke your iPod!
- Marty: What?
- Alex: The buttons were so small! It made me mad!
- Marty: The horror!
- Alex: It was an accident!
- Marty: I'm gonna kill you!
- Julien: [after Melman has announced he has only 48 hours to live] If I, King Julien, that's my name, had only two days to live, I would do all the things I always wanted to do.
- Melman: Like what?
- Julien: I'd become a professional whistler. I'm pretty fantastic right now, but I would do it professionally.
- [Tries to whistle, but all that comes out is a long raspberry]
- Julien: Another thing I would do is invade a neighboring country, and force my own ideology on them, even if they didn't want it.
- Alex: [Dancing as he speaks] How! Me and my friends fly... fly, on great metal bird... then we plummet...
- [whistles]
- Alex: Boom! Crash here. We offer only happiness and good greetings.
- Hippo Girlfriend: Is he dancing about a plane crash?
- Alex: Yeah, we are. Sorry.
- Melman: What, you don't have doctors here?
- Stephen: Well not any more.
- Melman: What if you catch a cold or something.
- Additional Giraffe: We go over to the dying holes, and we die.
- Alex: Slow down! You're gonna kill us! There's got to be another way! Pass it on!
- [the monkey chain relays the message up to the plane]
- Mason: Don't slow down. Kill us. It's the only way. Basset Hound!
- Skipper: The best sacrifice is the one made by others.
- [Nana shoots through the plane's windshield and blows off the bobblehead doll's head]
- Skipper: Doll! MEDIC!
- [Private gets out the duct tape]
- Baby Marty: I don't like the looks of this guy. He's a bit of a show-off.
- Baby Gloria: I think he's kinda cute.
- Baby Melman: You think he's cute?
- Skipper: We'll divide into three groups. Group Alpha, you're in charge of sheet metal fabrication. Group Bronson, you'll handle assembley. Group George Peppard, you'll handle craft services. Any questions?
- Julien: [as the plane dives] Raise your arms, Maurice! It's more fun when you raise your arms up like this, ah ha ha ha!
- Julien: [the animal herds are running towards the fiery volcano, planning on sacrificing Melman to the gods in hopes of creating water] Hurry up, before we come to our senses!
- Alex: Hey! Happy Slappers! Is there any reason to celebrate? Look at the plane!
- Skipper: We'll fix it.
- Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
- Skipper: Grit, spit
- [Private spits]
- Skipper: and a whole lotta duct tape.
- [Rico pulls out a roll of duct tape]
- Skipper: We should be up and running in say...
- [Kowalski shows him an abacus]
- Skipper: six to nine months.
- Alex: Sixty-nine months?
- Skipper: No, six *to* nine months.
- Julien: [referring to the fiery volcano] I'd jump in myself, if I weren't so good at whistling.
- [proceeds to whistle terribly]
- Makunga: Look at it this way. After I defeat you and take your place as alpha lion, you'll have that much more time to spend with your pathetic excuse of a son.
- Zuba: Before I kick your butt again, tell me why you want to be alpha lion?
- Makunga: I'm better looking, I have better hair, I'm deceitfully smart, and I want everyone to do what I say.
- Mason: The plane won't be fixed until the suits meet our demands. Now, about maternity leave.
- Skipper: Maternity leave?
- [glances under the table]
- Skipper: You're all male...
- Marty: Look, we need that plane for a rescue mission.
- Skipper: Well, there's nothing I can do until we bust up this union.
- Gloria: I'm gonna get to bustin' up all you if you don't get this plane going!
- Skipper: Can't you see these commies have my hands tied, here? NO maternity leave!
- Mason: [nudges Phil, who pulls out incriminating photos of Skipper and "Doll" in compromising positions] Maybe a certain someone wouldn't want *these* blowing around the savanna?
- Skipper: [reluctantly] All right, you get your maternity leave.