User Reviews

Maybe it was me, maybe it was the film.. maybe it was the dialogue ... that is time that I will never get back. I could not even find entertainment value in this film. Truly I must have missed the point of Poolman; love the actors and a big fan of their work yet this movie let me down.

Chris, your next project will be the winner. Let's get this on the shelf so others might not find themselves flipping channels and saying the same thing.. that's time I'll never get back.

The idea of intrigue, corruption, film noir and comedy only works with certain filmmakers (I think Coen brothers) so for now, take this review with a grain of salt ..

Not any good? I started watching this movie out of curiousity for the many SPLENDID supporting actors, whom the older generation will definitely remember with fond thoughts, like Dany DeVito, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Annete Bening and several others, BUT...

The bad: what Chris Pine tried to make here, is a QUIRKY comedy. There is a fine line though between quirky kinda funny and NOT funny at all. Quirky means odd, yet fascinating and a subtle (tongue in cheek) kinda funny, but this movie never reached that fine subtle level of comedy. Worse, I didnt even laugh once, not even a smirk or a smile. I did frown a lot...and sighed a lot...that's not what I longed for ofcourse...

They really tried to make this turn into a subtle quirky comedy, BUT its' OFF, it's just not working, it's too predictable and because of that quite boring to watch actually. And the many terrific supporting actors (way better than Chris Pine will ever be) those great, older actors only made this movie more painful to watch, because they have all starred in WAY better and WAY more popular and WAY more original (classic) movies than this unforunate flop.

Directorio debut and a mess, i dont think Chris Pine can be a very successful director, he is not a director material to be honest and i can see that here clearly, this was sad to watch, the incredible award winning cast is just sad to look, Pine needs to continue his action carrer and stop with this nonsense, he is not Bradley Cooper, he is not a good filmmaking, i hole he can understand that and continue to work in his amazing acting skills, Dungeons and dragons last year was amazing and funny, that's they things Pine needs to be doing and not this waste of cast and locations, its just a mess.

Everything, and I mean everything about this movie is egregiously bad. An offensive waste of time and talent.

What it is a forensic examination of pool maintenance filmed in the style of Chinatown.....I am not kidding.

I dare anyone to not feel bored by this after half an hour and I double dare them to watch to the end.

Yes Chris, of course you can make a movie with Danny DeVito and Annette Benning and a bunch of your other friends. And, of course you can write it and direct it having done neither of those things before.

The writing, direction, plot, cinematography, acting and editing seek only to confuse and annoy in equal measure.

This may be the worst movie ever made. And I'm still not kidding.

I Am the Night was a crime noir television show based on the Black Dahlia murders. Chris Pine really must like LA art deco inspired crime thrillers.

Poolman was directed, co written and starring Pine. Unfortunately this satirical take on Chinatown is a hot mess.

With his long hair, shaggy grey beard. Pine wants to reference the Dude, Jeff Bridges.

Unfortunately he is not that good an actor. As a director he can forget it. He is more Emilio Estevez, another actor with an appalling track record as a director.

Pine plays Darren, a pool cleaner in a run down apartment complex where some failed moviemakers live.

One day Darren is embroiled to do some undercover work on some crooked LA politicians. It is all to do with water.

As a detective satire or a movie satire, the film fails.

I would have never expected something like this from this gen's Captain Kirk, and I'm still not sure about what I just saw. Was it a pardoy of some sort to Chinatown? I don't know. Far for me to judge Pine on his looks but his attempts to be Jack Black if he lost weight did not cut it for me. Everything about the movie felt like he was trying to change his style to something that he truly is not.

I would love to say this movie was great. I'll admit Pine's bizzareness had me entertianed it helped that the It's always Sunny star, Danny Devito is in it as he knows Bizzare. Annette Betteing, John Ortiz and DeWanda Wise just happen to be good actors in a strange movie.

I just did not understand what was going on in this Mystery movie and who Pine is supposed to be cause he's not really a PoolMan.

Surprisingly good movie.

Requires paying attention...............while simultaneously kinda not getting what is going on?

I can understand the movie not making sense. A lot is going on. Sometimes it kinda doesn't make sense. But, it will make sense a little later.

Keep expecting the unexpected.

Keep in mind that I'm a wannabe screenwriter. So, before going, I didn't understand or know anything about Hollywood being part of it. A review mentioned showing real LA. Well, as an LA kid, I wanna see LA from the past.

Get stoned. Go. Chill and turn off your phone. Chill. Chill. Chiiiiiiilllllllllllax.

Chris Pine put together a quirky, meandering shaggy dog story that gushed with reverence for the City of Angels. His character's circle of friends have his back as he dives into the noirish world of a complex city. It is also about finding family wherever we can. The movie has a heart and soul. The plot line was flimsy. That's the point. I loved the references to other LA-based movies with sun-soaked protagonists who are in over their heads. I'll be watching it again to look for more obscure references. Poolman is not a Marvel mega-pic. It's a weird, jazzy homage to a city that is always changing its skin and costumes. That's why I love Poolman and the City of Los Angeles!