NOTE: Minor spoilers here.
Sometimes I come on this site and realize there are thousands upon thousands of movies in existence. I wonder how so many could be made, and then I think about cheap, simplistic movies like "Armstrong," and my wonders cease. Don't let familiar faces drag you to see this. All of them have been in a lot better movies, and it is a mystic puzzle how they could all participate in this. Frank Zagarino can be a good actor when he wants to, and is a hoot in the "Project: Shadowchaser" films; Joe Lara was in "Hologram Man," which was a pleasant surprise for me; and Charles Napier and Richard Lynch are veterans in the industry. But there is so much wrong with "Armstrong" that it is impossible to cover all the negative points and tough to decide where to start.
Zagarino plays Rod Armstrong, an ex-CIA agent that now works as freelance muscle. He leaves America and goes to Moscow, where he is hired by high-ranking general Richard Lynch. Armstrong's former friend (Napier) arrives in Moscow with his young wife, and has knowledge that some Russians are not obeying an anti-nuke treaty. He is killed by Joe Lara, a member of the American Mafia put in charge of the Russian Mafia by corrupt Russian leaders. Armstrong vows to stop the plot. Speaking of plot, that is about it. You've probably seen hundreds of similar, better movies with the same plot, and can figure out every step of this one. Heck, the moment one sees Richard Lynch as a Russian colonel, you know he'll turn out to be corrupt. Even I could ignore the triviality of the plot, but the rest is inexcusable. The direction is awful. It jumps from scene to scene without a piece of inspiration. The "action" is really bad, and I doubt if even a good director could make them exciting with the script that this movie has. Take for example the scene where Lara breaks into Zagarino's home for the first time. A grenade is dropped, and to avoid death, Zagarino dives out the window and onto a pea soup green van unharmed. But no one else in the apartment gets out before the blast, but they still survive without a scratch. What's worse is that the blast doesn't even damage Zagarino's home, as it is intact in later scenes. Oh, but flaws like that are sprinkled throughout the film. Bad guys killed or knocked out suddenly show up a few scenes later, and at one point, a dead body in the background has a very noticeable leg twitch. I could go on and on...
But the horrible dialogue is what makes you embarrassed to be viewing the film over all the other bad points. It is the worst I think I have ever heard. I usually just shake my head at bad dialogue, but when I heard Joe Lara say "He knows much too much" I laughed so loud I had to muffle my mouth with my hands. So if you are in the video rental store, and you spot this in the action section, secretly move it to the comedy section where it belongs. Zantara's score: 1 out of 10.
Sometimes I come on this site and realize there are thousands upon thousands of movies in existence. I wonder how so many could be made, and then I think about cheap, simplistic movies like "Armstrong," and my wonders cease. Don't let familiar faces drag you to see this. All of them have been in a lot better movies, and it is a mystic puzzle how they could all participate in this. Frank Zagarino can be a good actor when he wants to, and is a hoot in the "Project: Shadowchaser" films; Joe Lara was in "Hologram Man," which was a pleasant surprise for me; and Charles Napier and Richard Lynch are veterans in the industry. But there is so much wrong with "Armstrong" that it is impossible to cover all the negative points and tough to decide where to start.
Zagarino plays Rod Armstrong, an ex-CIA agent that now works as freelance muscle. He leaves America and goes to Moscow, where he is hired by high-ranking general Richard Lynch. Armstrong's former friend (Napier) arrives in Moscow with his young wife, and has knowledge that some Russians are not obeying an anti-nuke treaty. He is killed by Joe Lara, a member of the American Mafia put in charge of the Russian Mafia by corrupt Russian leaders. Armstrong vows to stop the plot. Speaking of plot, that is about it. You've probably seen hundreds of similar, better movies with the same plot, and can figure out every step of this one. Heck, the moment one sees Richard Lynch as a Russian colonel, you know he'll turn out to be corrupt. Even I could ignore the triviality of the plot, but the rest is inexcusable. The direction is awful. It jumps from scene to scene without a piece of inspiration. The "action" is really bad, and I doubt if even a good director could make them exciting with the script that this movie has. Take for example the scene where Lara breaks into Zagarino's home for the first time. A grenade is dropped, and to avoid death, Zagarino dives out the window and onto a pea soup green van unharmed. But no one else in the apartment gets out before the blast, but they still survive without a scratch. What's worse is that the blast doesn't even damage Zagarino's home, as it is intact in later scenes. Oh, but flaws like that are sprinkled throughout the film. Bad guys killed or knocked out suddenly show up a few scenes later, and at one point, a dead body in the background has a very noticeable leg twitch. I could go on and on...
But the horrible dialogue is what makes you embarrassed to be viewing the film over all the other bad points. It is the worst I think I have ever heard. I usually just shake my head at bad dialogue, but when I heard Joe Lara say "He knows much too much" I laughed so loud I had to muffle my mouth with my hands. So if you are in the video rental store, and you spot this in the action section, secretly move it to the comedy section where it belongs. Zantara's score: 1 out of 10.