Never has there been a movie with so many tu-tus. Or simpering. Simper, simper, simper. Is that all "Louise" the snub-nosed unpopular frump can do? "Oh, Braaaad," she simpers mousily. From a frumpy, mousey girl she is magically transformed into a big-haired, make-up spackled Brad-humper by her magical "amulet" which she fondles constantly. No part of this movie is anything like real life. No teenagers acted like this. When Randa was having a party the same night as Louise were we to believe that all the people who were going to Randa's party would've supposedly gone to Louise's party? Why did it matter...the popular people weren't friends with her...that's real life, but not in this movie. Any why did the Millers live in a huge house but made her wear flour sacks and dowdy sweater vests to school? Was it their religion or something, to have to wear ugly sacks as a teen? The music and fashions of the 80's were only this bad in Teen Witch. How can any of you people think that this movie was touching or moving, or that any of the actors, namely Robyn Lively, had any talent at all? How can people think she was "charismatic" or had "quick wit"? She was a forgettable, creepy, pig-nosed talentless twit who kept speaking with this forced sibilant accent and being a real drip. Why did her parents make her dress so frumpily? Why did she suddenly have a closet full of tu-tus and redder hair which was suddenly curly and in a constant side pony-tail? And also the frosted lipstick and heavy blush....we are to believe that THIS is what makes a girl popular? The "I want to be the most popular girl" song is terrible. Some of the words are,"Gonna see some major changes comin' over me, gonna change my hair and makeup, soon you're gonna see." This movie is telling all shallow mousey teenagers what they want to hear...with some bigger hair, heavier make-up, and a closet full of tu-tu's you WILL be the most popular girl and everyone will applaud you when you walk into home-ec. Leave your drippy pal behind and go slobber on your Brad at an abandoned farmhouse, but not before a sleazy game of strip hide-and-seek. The answers to happiness are just a can of aqua-net away. Mousey girls: This should be YOUR GOAL as a teenager. Shallowness counts! Be shallow and remember Zelda Rubenstein loves you.
Review of Teen Witch
