CONTAINS SPOILERS - NOT THAT YOU ARE MISSING MUCH MIND! There are good bad movies and there are bad bad movies. Then there are British made totally unintelligible straight to video vehicles such as this codswallop.
The plot - for want of a much better word and assuming you can find it that is - basically concerns Michael Caine's dodgy violent armed robber working for an equally dodgy but well connected gentleman (played with slimy smoothness by Edward Fox) in order to lift a van load of banknote paper which we later see, appears to be transported around in the most insecure high security van I have ever seen!! The instrument by which the plot circulates around is something to do with hitting the van when it is in a radio black spot that has been amplified by some steel scaffolding on the nearby cathedral any science student will tell you this plot device is a load of cobblers for a starter.
Along the way as the film plod very slowly onwards we meet some paper thin cardboard cut out henchman including Leslie Grantham who plays the angry cockney wide boy from the east end of London who provides the muscle for the robbery in other words exactly the same role he plays in pretty much everything he has ever appeared in so no typecasting there then ..
The script is woeful, the plot almost non existent and the supposedly inter-weaved storyline about the large choirboy, his rather unpleasant mates and the girl he fancies is completely pointless and irrelevant, making up a large part of the film that should have been jettisoned at the first script read through as it would never have been missed.
The clichés are free flowing pretty much throughout. Be it the hilarious meeting of Michael Caine and his employer around a picnic table in the middle of what looks suspiciously like a disused cement works in deepest darkest Surrey or Grantham's stereotype cockney villain.
Along the way we also encounter an escort girl who adds nothing to the story whatsoever except she is nice to look at, some quite nice scenery and actually some decent camera work.
However the heist itself which supposedly is meant to be at the centre of the story takes ages to eventually turn up, is handled badly, has huge plot holes you could drive a bus through and quite frankly the tarted up cheap and cheerful ex British Gas van is not fooling anyone! Also for such a high security cargo, you would expect at least to find a) an armed Police escort and b) a much sturdier van than the second hand rust bucket that this film's budget seemingly only just managed to stretch to.
I can only assume the quite stellar cast were in desperate need of the cash, they certainly would not have done this film to win any awards except maybe a golden raspberry.
And for their efforts, this rubbish that was already old and dated when it was made, lurked on a shelf unreleased for years and then went straight to a £1 DVD release in the 'Cheap Tat' section of my local supermarket!!
The plot - for want of a much better word and assuming you can find it that is - basically concerns Michael Caine's dodgy violent armed robber working for an equally dodgy but well connected gentleman (played with slimy smoothness by Edward Fox) in order to lift a van load of banknote paper which we later see, appears to be transported around in the most insecure high security van I have ever seen!! The instrument by which the plot circulates around is something to do with hitting the van when it is in a radio black spot that has been amplified by some steel scaffolding on the nearby cathedral any science student will tell you this plot device is a load of cobblers for a starter.
Along the way as the film plod very slowly onwards we meet some paper thin cardboard cut out henchman including Leslie Grantham who plays the angry cockney wide boy from the east end of London who provides the muscle for the robbery in other words exactly the same role he plays in pretty much everything he has ever appeared in so no typecasting there then ..
The script is woeful, the plot almost non existent and the supposedly inter-weaved storyline about the large choirboy, his rather unpleasant mates and the girl he fancies is completely pointless and irrelevant, making up a large part of the film that should have been jettisoned at the first script read through as it would never have been missed.
The clichés are free flowing pretty much throughout. Be it the hilarious meeting of Michael Caine and his employer around a picnic table in the middle of what looks suspiciously like a disused cement works in deepest darkest Surrey or Grantham's stereotype cockney villain.
Along the way we also encounter an escort girl who adds nothing to the story whatsoever except she is nice to look at, some quite nice scenery and actually some decent camera work.
However the heist itself which supposedly is meant to be at the centre of the story takes ages to eventually turn up, is handled badly, has huge plot holes you could drive a bus through and quite frankly the tarted up cheap and cheerful ex British Gas van is not fooling anyone! Also for such a high security cargo, you would expect at least to find a) an armed Police escort and b) a much sturdier van than the second hand rust bucket that this film's budget seemingly only just managed to stretch to.
I can only assume the quite stellar cast were in desperate need of the cash, they certainly would not have done this film to win any awards except maybe a golden raspberry.
And for their efforts, this rubbish that was already old and dated when it was made, lurked on a shelf unreleased for years and then went straight to a £1 DVD release in the 'Cheap Tat' section of my local supermarket!!