Tales of the Vikings (1959–1960)
8/10
My vague memories of Tales of The Vikings TV show
10 August 2007
I remember that scene with the magnetic mountain. Erik goes to swing his sword, and it sticks to a rock on a mountain pass wall. Or maybe it was an adversary swinging it at Erik. Too long ago to remember clearly.

There was also an episode where Erik had a villain's girlfriend as a hostage. He stood her on a wall, and cut the sleeves and skirt off her dress with his sword! It left her in a sort of Danskin affair, quite modest. He did it just to show he meant business, you see.

The bad guy was really peeved at that. He kept threatening Erik with awful tortures, when he caught him. But of course, Erik got out of it. Don't ask me how.

Even though I was only nine, that episode got me all hot and bothered. I dug Vikings before the show, but after that, they were my favorites.

I vaguely remember that Spanish episode, and boy, it was a drag! I knew that the Vikings would have needed a time machine to get to that version of Spain. They did that all the time on TV back then. Robin Hood would show up in Australia, Zorro would meet George Washington. Drove me crazy!

What they might have done was to show how a young (13!), Viking king Sigurd Jorsalfar, went to Palestine, just after the First Crusade, in 1107. Erik and the gang could have tagged along. His large fleet stopped off in Spain, and aided local Christians in one of their periodic wars with their Muslim neighbors. (Hey, it was a Crusade, okay?) Then they went to Palestine, did some fighting for the King of Jerusalem, and went home. I think they sailed into the Black Sea, and up the Russian rivers to the Baltic, to get there. Those guys got around! But I guess the show's writers weren't up on that.

And yes, The Thirteenth Warrior is damn good. It's based on a novel called Eaters of The Dead, by Michael Cricton, which is also quite good. It's the Beowulf story, with a new twist on Grendel. It's way cool!

So is the film The Long Ships, with Richard Widmark and Sidney Poitier, as the Emir of Morocco. Check out the giant scimitar slide. Nothing like that in any theme park these days! But the orgy scene is more fun.

And the bad guy in Viking film, that the TV show was based on, was named (Wait for it!)...Egbert! How many movie villains can claim that?
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