Apache Blood (1973)
2/10
"Help me, somebody help me"!
28 August 2010
Warning: Spoilers
My summary quote was yelled out by mountain man Sam Glass (Dewiit Lee) as he wandered helplessly through the desert, but could just as well have been uttered by myself at just about any point in the flick. This one's not to be confused with "Cry Blood, Apache", up till now what I had considered to be the worst Western I'd ever seen. Slow, tedious and boring the first time around, the picture manages to fill some screen time with a laborious rehash of the high (low) points with a flashback sequence just before it wraps things up.

But as bad as it is, I tried to find some takeaway that might make it interesting for the casual observer. There's that scene when Sam launches what looks like a small rock at a hill climbing Apache giving chase, and it turns into a boulder just before hitting him in the head! And the mountain man's nightmarish chomp down on a hapless desert lizard is about as gross as you can get.

One thing I couldn't figure out - when Sam buried that cactus pad surprise in the dirt for the Indians on horseback, why would that have made any difference? Horses have hooves, how could that have possibly bothered them?

Ray Danton portrays Mescalero Apache Yellow Shirt, out to avenge renegade soldiers that wiped out members of his tribe. His name's not that well known today, perhaps only by followers of TV Westerns back in the day. My first look at him was in an episode of 'Lawman' starring John Russell. He played a gunman named Yawkey, and it was such a convincing portrayal that I consider that episode to be my favorite of the series.
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