I had high hopes from this movie. If someone knows how to make an exploitative quasi-B movie gore-fest, it's Rodriguez. It started good, too. The first scene and opening credits were exactly what was needed to put me in the right mood. And then, the rest of the movie happened.
Roughly speaking, there are three types of scenes that are mashed together into this film - politics, sex and action.
1. Politics
I'm not really invested in the whole immigration issue (not an American), but even to me it was obvious Rodriguez chose to present his view with all the objectiveness and finesse of a bulldozer. OK, so not every movie has to pussyfoot down the middle lane and try not to offend anyone, I get that. The problem is, even from the pure propaganda standpoint, Rodriguez did a terrible job of turning me against American immigration policy!
Not a single Mexican character in this film came out overly sympathetic or righteous. Instead of showing me why the deportation of illegal immigrants is wrong (waste of effort, breaking up families etc), the film takes its assortment of morally gray Mexican criminals and pits them against cartoonishly evil Americans, hoping they might look better in contrast. The ending was particularly distressing, what with every day laborer in town receiving a signal from this underground organization, taking a gun and rising in a bloody revolution against the locals. If I was a Texan, I'd definitely start keeping a closer eye on old Pedro in the backyard and call my Congressman about that border fence they were promising to build.
Good job, Rodriguez, you really made your point.
2. Sex
So, here's this middle-aged, scared, barely speaking, scary looking Mexican guy, wooing literally every female he stumbles across. A cop who's supposed to arrest him for the admitted attempted murder, an underground leader whose organization he had just compromised, a rich girl and her mother who think he's a day laborer... it matters not to MACHETE, within minutes each one is putty in his hands. He usually doesn't even have to open his mouth, one look of his soulless murderer eyes is enough to completely break their defenses.
"Relax, it's not supposed to make sense, it's just an exploitation movie, man!", positive reviewers would say, I gather.
Only, it's not. Not really. An exploitation movie is just that, exploitation of a theme through action and sex. It doesn't try to have a point or a political agenda. This one does.
Here's the thing. You can't have me all invested into immigrant plight at one moment, and then jump straight into instant-seduction in next. When are you joking and when not? What parts am I to take seriously? Is this happening in real world or a cartoon?
I've read a lot of rave reviews about an 'exploitation flick with a brain' and stuff like that. For me, it's the exact opposite. Instead of complimenting one another, the two parts clash, leaving only a mess behind.
3) Action
OK, so the plot and the message are a little shaky, but we've all seen that fantastic trailer in Grindhouse. You have a huge Mexican dude chopping guys to pieces in creative ways, hot chicks with big guns, minigun bikes and Steven Seagul with a katana. How can you go wrong with that?
You'd think you can't, but Rodriguez somehow managed to screw up action even worse than in Planet Terror. Whether it's editing, choreography or directing (probably all of the above), action sequence in this movie just don't work.
Danny Trejo is especially problematic. He may look tough, but seeing him lumber through fight scenes, it's obvious he has neither the physique nor charisma to sell himself as a big action hero. It's only through copious editing that he manages not to get shot (standard trick of him just appearing where he needs to be to chop guys down).
But even if he were the new Schwarzenegger, it wouldn't improve the overall impression. Bad choreography and the complete lack of fluidity and realism would still kill any momentum an occasional neat move might generate.
The funny thing is, this realization sort of creeps up on you, so by the time you realize that what you're watching is just BAD, it's too late to shut it down (or walk out). Instead of upping the ante as the plot rolls by, leading up to an explosive finale, Rodriguez somehow managed to do the exact opposite. The best action 'Machete' has is in its opening sequence. The tempo and quality gradually drop throughout the movie, to reach the rock bottom in the end.
The less said about the ending, the better. All the worst action and political 'messages' (calls to lynch, more accurately) are crammed in those awful 5 minutes. I fast forwarded through some of it, but what I saw was enough to cement my opinion of 'Machete'.
Bad politics, bad acting and bad action don't make a movie worthy of such a high score on IMDb (7.4 at the time of writing this). A few juicy gore shots (that you probably saw in trailers anyway) and the solid first 30-45 minutes barely raise 'Machete' up to 4 stars on my scale.
Roughly speaking, there are three types of scenes that are mashed together into this film - politics, sex and action.
1. Politics
I'm not really invested in the whole immigration issue (not an American), but even to me it was obvious Rodriguez chose to present his view with all the objectiveness and finesse of a bulldozer. OK, so not every movie has to pussyfoot down the middle lane and try not to offend anyone, I get that. The problem is, even from the pure propaganda standpoint, Rodriguez did a terrible job of turning me against American immigration policy!
Not a single Mexican character in this film came out overly sympathetic or righteous. Instead of showing me why the deportation of illegal immigrants is wrong (waste of effort, breaking up families etc), the film takes its assortment of morally gray Mexican criminals and pits them against cartoonishly evil Americans, hoping they might look better in contrast. The ending was particularly distressing, what with every day laborer in town receiving a signal from this underground organization, taking a gun and rising in a bloody revolution against the locals. If I was a Texan, I'd definitely start keeping a closer eye on old Pedro in the backyard and call my Congressman about that border fence they were promising to build.
Good job, Rodriguez, you really made your point.
2. Sex
So, here's this middle-aged, scared, barely speaking, scary looking Mexican guy, wooing literally every female he stumbles across. A cop who's supposed to arrest him for the admitted attempted murder, an underground leader whose organization he had just compromised, a rich girl and her mother who think he's a day laborer... it matters not to MACHETE, within minutes each one is putty in his hands. He usually doesn't even have to open his mouth, one look of his soulless murderer eyes is enough to completely break their defenses.
"Relax, it's not supposed to make sense, it's just an exploitation movie, man!", positive reviewers would say, I gather.
Only, it's not. Not really. An exploitation movie is just that, exploitation of a theme through action and sex. It doesn't try to have a point or a political agenda. This one does.
Here's the thing. You can't have me all invested into immigrant plight at one moment, and then jump straight into instant-seduction in next. When are you joking and when not? What parts am I to take seriously? Is this happening in real world or a cartoon?
I've read a lot of rave reviews about an 'exploitation flick with a brain' and stuff like that. For me, it's the exact opposite. Instead of complimenting one another, the two parts clash, leaving only a mess behind.
3) Action
OK, so the plot and the message are a little shaky, but we've all seen that fantastic trailer in Grindhouse. You have a huge Mexican dude chopping guys to pieces in creative ways, hot chicks with big guns, minigun bikes and Steven Seagul with a katana. How can you go wrong with that?
You'd think you can't, but Rodriguez somehow managed to screw up action even worse than in Planet Terror. Whether it's editing, choreography or directing (probably all of the above), action sequence in this movie just don't work.
Danny Trejo is especially problematic. He may look tough, but seeing him lumber through fight scenes, it's obvious he has neither the physique nor charisma to sell himself as a big action hero. It's only through copious editing that he manages not to get shot (standard trick of him just appearing where he needs to be to chop guys down).
But even if he were the new Schwarzenegger, it wouldn't improve the overall impression. Bad choreography and the complete lack of fluidity and realism would still kill any momentum an occasional neat move might generate.
The funny thing is, this realization sort of creeps up on you, so by the time you realize that what you're watching is just BAD, it's too late to shut it down (or walk out). Instead of upping the ante as the plot rolls by, leading up to an explosive finale, Rodriguez somehow managed to do the exact opposite. The best action 'Machete' has is in its opening sequence. The tempo and quality gradually drop throughout the movie, to reach the rock bottom in the end.
The less said about the ending, the better. All the worst action and political 'messages' (calls to lynch, more accurately) are crammed in those awful 5 minutes. I fast forwarded through some of it, but what I saw was enough to cement my opinion of 'Machete'.
Bad politics, bad acting and bad action don't make a movie worthy of such a high score on IMDb (7.4 at the time of writing this). A few juicy gore shots (that you probably saw in trailers anyway) and the solid first 30-45 minutes barely raise 'Machete' up to 4 stars on my scale.