2/10
Finally....a Tarzan film for extremely stupid people!
5 March 2011
I have seen a ton of Tarzan films recently--most of them the classic Johnny Weissmuller films. So, when I watched "Tarzan and the Green Goddess" the difference between this film and the rest was obvious. Not only was this a bad movie, but it was a pretty dumb one. Now I am not saying that the other Tarzan films were perfect...it's just that "Tarzan and the Green Goddess" is about as far from perfect as you can get!!! Below are a small number of the seriously screwed up things about this film:

1. Tarzan is in Guatemala. Freakin' Central American GUATEMALA!! 'Nuff said!

2. Despite being in Guatemala, you see stock footage of mountain lions and lots of African animals!

3. Despite being raised in the jungle by apes, this Tarzan is nearly as well-spoken, mannerly and polite as John Gielgud! Apparently this Tarzan went to charm school and was raised by English apes!

4. The story was original a 12-part serial. However, some geniuses decided to chop it apart and create an all-new movie from these parts. As a result, the story is often incomprehensible and dumb. Perhaps part of what they cut out were the 10 years or more Tarzan spent in charm school.

The bottom line is that this is a bargain basement Tarzan--and the writers seemed to have complete contempt for the material and the audience. See it at your own peril.

Oh, and at one point in the film they talk about the Mayan ruins at Quirigua. This is a real place and I have visited there myself--it's pretty cool. However, I saw no evidence of any Mayan explosive devices like they had in the film--and, by the way, it IS a Mayan ruin, not Aztec (which they called it in the movie).

UPDATE: Apparently this film and "The New Adventures of Tarzan" were pieced together using portions of the SAME movie serial. Both are pretty bad--but at least the picture quality and sound in "Tarzan and the Green Goddess" were a bit better. Also, for more on these films and how they relate to the MGM series, check out the Wikipedia page for the movies.
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