It would have been nice if this Mila Jovavich vehicle had anything remotely to do with the original Dumas masterpiece, but alas, it seems too much to ask of Hollywood's dread cash hounds, who, like some sort of anti-Jesus, can magically transform the finest of wine into sh*t.
I hope the angry ghost of Dumas defecates in their mouths as they sleep for foisting this god awful mess upon us. The only reason it merited any stars is because Ms. Jovavich is stunning, and the special effects were pretty. These were barely enough to rescue my PC from death by stomping after watching about half of this outrage.
If you find yourself about to watch - save yourself!
I hope the angry ghost of Dumas defecates in their mouths as they sleep for foisting this god awful mess upon us. The only reason it merited any stars is because Ms. Jovavich is stunning, and the special effects were pretty. These were barely enough to rescue my PC from death by stomping after watching about half of this outrage.
If you find yourself about to watch - save yourself!