Hemlock Grove (2013–2015)
3/10
Unfortunate how bad this is
6 May 2013
Warning: Spoilers
I really wanted to like this series, especially after seeing how awesome House of Cards was. The fact that this was supposed to be a horror series made it even more appealing to me.

Unfortunately this is like a bad version of The Vampire Diaries. This series had potential to be really good but is just terribly written. The dialogue was absolutely awful. There are so many forced one liners thrown in and the way the two main characters say "shiiiiit" in almost every episode is just terrible.

****Warning Spoilers**** They also don't do a very good job of explaining anything in the series. The first couple episodes I was wondering if werewolves were normal in this world, then later you find out that they're not normal and no one believes in them but for some reason this town is willing to blame the murders on some kid that some other kid said was a werewolf. I was like WTF, terrible terrible storytelling.

And the f***ing bacon grease scene, WTF was that. When I saw it I couldn't believe they actually put that in the episode. It could have been so much better. They find out who the killer is and she confesses what she did and says she wants to die as long as he doesn't hate her. All he has to do is cut off her head. Instead the writers are like let's see how stupid of a scene we can actually get them to put in this series. Let's imply that he has to fight her as a werewolf and that he has to sacrifice his face and needs bacon grease to turn when it's not a full moon. Then instead of cutting off her head, he's going to let her turn and rub bacon grease on his face, then she's going to eat his face off and attack his best friend and girlfriend and almost kill them. Then finally he's going to turn and she's going to kill him anyway. So F***ing terrible, F***ing bacon grease. Seriously if you want to see how terrible the show is, just watch the first 10 minutes or so of episode 13.

****End Spoilers****

I watched the whole season hoping it would get better but it only got worse. The actors did an OK job with what they had to work with, but overall they didn't help make the series any better. The finale, which in my opinion is usually the best episode of a season and should be, was absolutely terrible. It had one good scene that made me think, finally they did something right.

Bottom line if you can get past the terrible dialogue and forced one liners you might be able to enjoy it a little, but there are much better things to watch. If you're just looking for something to pass the time as long as you don't expect too much you shouldn't be too disappointed.
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