Dead Cert (2010)
5/10
British thoroughbred B-flick
10 May 2014
DEAD CERT is nothing more than a British rip-off of the ultra-cool vampire flick FROM DUSK TILL DAWN, with the action shifted to London and a cast of mildly familiar faces from British TV rather than big name stars. The biggest, and unfortunately, crippling, problem that DEAD CERT faces is that it was made with a very low budget, meaning the whole thing looks cheap, and also amateurish in places.

One-time hard-man Craig Fairbrass (DARKLANDS) plays a Cockney chap who's ploughed his life savings into opening a new club, only to have it taken over by Romanian gangsters who also happen to be vampires. Don't you just hate it when that happens? As in FROM DUSK TILL DAWN, the first half is a typical gangster film while the second is a vampire-heavy set-piece.

Compare this to FROM DUSK TILL DAWN and you'll be disappointed, because it's nowhere near as good. The calibre of the script just isn't there and the special effects are entirely limited. Still, I went in expecting absolutely nothing, and as a result I found myself enjoying this. There are frequent funny moments, and it's great fun seeing all the familiar faces. The attempted additions to the vampire mythology are a hoot - apparently vampires are afraid of dogs and instead of using crucifixes, you only have to have something you have faith in. None of it makes much sense but it is fun.

Chief vampire duties are handed out to EASTENDERS actor and one-time insurance advert man Billy Murray, who perhaps wisely doesn't bother attempting an accent here. There are brief cameos from the likes of Jason Flemyng and Danny Dyer, along with a larger slice of the action from laughable one-time Hollywood star Steven Berkoff, who really does seem to have fallen on hard times. Watch out for THIS IS ENGLAND's Perry Benson and 300's Andrew Tiernan in supporting roles, and a fairly meaty part from the impossible to dislike Dexter Fletcher. Interesting, most of the main stars seem to have doubled up as producers, alongside Martin Kemp, so there's a lot of enthusiasm here; it's just a shame it's not matched by quality.
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