Review of Loosies

Loosies (2011)
9/10
How can anyone not love this film?
11 November 2014
I didn't know a thing about this movie other than its less-than-inspiring IMDb plot synopsis but I watched it anyway just because I had a sleepless night to kill. 88 minutes later I felt like I had just watched a modern classic.

First of all, who would've guessed that prettyboy Peter Facinelli ("Twilight") could write such a clever story as well as act it to perfection? Here we have a crime-drama-romance that can be every bit as chilling as Scorcese's "Goodfellas" (1990), every bit as human as De Sica's "Bicycle Thieves" (1948), every bit as romantic as Reiner's "When Harry Met Sally" (1989) and with an ending as unexpected as "The Usual Suspects" (1995), all wrapped up in a superbly acted & directed hour and a half.

The plot cannot be properly conveyed in less than 500 words so I won't bother trying. Let's just say it has to do with a small-time crook who gets in big-time trouble while simultaneously meeting his dream girl and royally screwing that up, too. But he's a good kid who loves his momma and is the most ethical crook since Robin Hood, so we can't help but love the guy. Unfortunately there are several psychos on his tail, and when I say psychos I mean psy-CHOs.

I didn't realize beforehand that two of my favorite actors were in this film: Joe Pantoliano (whom I'll always remember as "Doc" from "Eddie & the Cruisers", but you may know him as "Ralph" on "The Sopranos") and the incomparable Vincent Gallo ("Buffalo 66"). For you Gallo fans, he reprises a classic line from Buffalo 66: "All girls are evil!" which got a unanimous LOL from the room. I was sorta by myself, but that's beside the point.

Gallo actually plays one of the aforementioned psychos while the other psycho is played by a very disturbing Michael Madsen ("Reservoir Dogs"). They each play the type of character who could, at any minute, jab a pencil in someone's eye just because they don't like the way they look.

Balance this against Peter Facinelli's boyscout charm and Jaimie Alexander's sweet, wholesome demeanor, and who could overlook the brilliantly cast Marianne Leone (Joanne on "The Sopranos") as momma, and you have yourself the full spectrum of characters, making this a very unpredictable and consequently a very tense film.

I should add that it has a very cool soundtrack with music by bands I had never heard of, but I'll be looking them up. Particularly the film's theme song "Sing Out" by the Grand Magnolias.

I usually end my reviews with a list of similar films, but "Loosies" is truly one-of-a-kind. Don't miss it, if you know what's good for you.
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