It's a trial to sit through this travesty. First, Bruce Bennett is not Tarzan. Johnny Weissmuller is Tarzan. True, Bruce Bennett, like Wiessmuller, was an Olympic Champion, but Bennett is merely bland and well spoken, while Weismuller is majestically stupid and has poetry.
This takes place deep in the jungles of Guatamala, so deep that the hand of man has never set foot there, and which some will be surprised to find teeming with African animals like giraffes. The country is primitive. The natives of Guatamala worship a stone idol that is sought by rival teams of explorers. Why? Because hidden inside the idol is an ancient Mayan recipe for a salad dressing which was dreamed up by a chef in San Francisco's Palace Hotel in 1923.
Spoiler Alert:
1 avocado, peeled and pitted; 1 cup mayonnaise; 5 anchovy fillets, rinsed and chopped; 2 tablespoons chopped green onion
1 tablespoon lemon juice; 1 clove garlic, chopped; salt and pepper to taste
In a blender combine the avocado, mayonnaise, anchovies, green onion, lemon juice, garlic, and salt and pepper. Process until smooth, then chill for 24 hours before serving
The first words out of this well-groomed Tarzan's mouth are: "Good-bye, old man."
"Tarzan and his band of intrepid followers" must get this secret recipe back to Livingston, whom I thought long dead, before an "unscrupulous band of crooks" can get their hands on it and become "a menace to the whole world."
I frankly don't know whether they made it not. I got so hungry that I shut the movie off and made a chef's salad. But, looking at the shape the world is in today, threatened from all sides, my bet is that they didn't get to Livingston and that the formula fell into those unscrupulous hands.
This takes place deep in the jungles of Guatamala, so deep that the hand of man has never set foot there, and which some will be surprised to find teeming with African animals like giraffes. The country is primitive. The natives of Guatamala worship a stone idol that is sought by rival teams of explorers. Why? Because hidden inside the idol is an ancient Mayan recipe for a salad dressing which was dreamed up by a chef in San Francisco's Palace Hotel in 1923.
Spoiler Alert:
1 avocado, peeled and pitted; 1 cup mayonnaise; 5 anchovy fillets, rinsed and chopped; 2 tablespoons chopped green onion
1 tablespoon lemon juice; 1 clove garlic, chopped; salt and pepper to taste
In a blender combine the avocado, mayonnaise, anchovies, green onion, lemon juice, garlic, and salt and pepper. Process until smooth, then chill for 24 hours before serving
The first words out of this well-groomed Tarzan's mouth are: "Good-bye, old man."
"Tarzan and his band of intrepid followers" must get this secret recipe back to Livingston, whom I thought long dead, before an "unscrupulous band of crooks" can get their hands on it and become "a menace to the whole world."
I frankly don't know whether they made it not. I got so hungry that I shut the movie off and made a chef's salad. But, looking at the shape the world is in today, threatened from all sides, my bet is that they didn't get to Livingston and that the formula fell into those unscrupulous hands.