Review of Annie Was a Wonder

. . . reveals that John Nesbitt suffered from some sort of boyhood glandular problem which stunted his growth to a minuscule one-hundredth of an inch from age 10 to 15, the span of John's childhood covered during ANNIE WAS A WONDER. The title character toiled at hard labor for 84 hours weekly at a pay rate of LESS THAN a nickel an hour. The stingy Rich People of the new and odoriferous Rump\Scents Administration plan to ELIMINATE the minimum wage, since their Moscow Master Red Commie KGB Chief Vlad "Mad Dog" Putin's Russia sees no need for minimum wages. Russian serfs have never been able to find time for outside hobbies, unlike America's Black Slaves of the 1800s, who invented Negro Spirituals, Jumping the Broom, Dark Chocolate Pie, Jazz, and NBA Basketball in the Spare Time of their Antebellum Days. So all of you California burger flippers better enjoy your $7.65 hourly Bonanza while it lasts, because if you're not up to Annie's snuff, your next boss under Rump\Scents might decide you're only worth TWO CENTS an hour!