3/10
It would have been, had there actually been romance!
1 June 2019
Warning: Spoilers
The same year that this disappointing period musical from Paramount came out, Monogram released a film called "Music Man" in their "Teenagers" series. That forgotten B film was much more entertaining than this A release from one of the five major studios, and indicated to me that this film needed a character like Harold Hill to stir things up. indeed, this is in the neck of the woods of the United States where Hill, in Broadway's "The Music Man", traveled around, conning the townsfolk. Pretty much nothing happens in the 90 minutes of this slice of life piece of nostalgia where instead of bread, the audience is given crumbs.

The story focuses on a southern export to the north, confederate civil war veteran Roland Culver who can't seem to let the past go even though he has changed his whereabouts. He has three daughters who have dared to go "north" on him, and that's pretty much creates the only conflict within this family. Much of it involves the romantic issues of the three daughters (Veronica Lake, Mary Hatcher, Mona Freeman) which doesn't really create any story. Their three men, Billy De Wolfe, Patrick Knowles and Richard Webb, are basically cardboard cutouts and don't resemble any human being, living or dead. Only De Wolfe shows any spark, and that is because he has written to be a complete buffoon.

in her film debut, Pearl Bailey is the family domestic, commenting sardonically on the action (or lack of it) through two inconsequential songs. The title is only heard over the opening credits, and as answered by a famous classic movie critic with a one-word review, has had more notoriety than the film has had viewings since its original release. There are a few amusing moments, such as the sisters and De Wolfe's recreation of a Nickelodeon movie show, a musical number leading to a town picnic and the outcome of an explosive put in a band tuba. But a few funny moments do not make a good film, and none of the performances really warrant any praise. With the number of nostalgic period musicals made around this time, this is by far the weakest. Stick with "Mother Wore Tights", "Centennial Summer", or even "Summer Holiday". To quote an old Grace Moore song, I'll take romance, but unfortunately I did not find that here.
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