7/10
This film is bonkers in all the right ways
29 January 2023
Kurt Russell stars as Jack Burton, a long haul truck driver who ends up getting caught up in this bizarre fight in San Francisco's Chinatown district. As an aside, never once does he have a trailer hooked up to his rig. What exactly is he hauling? I guess I can assume he picked up a trailer from his origin point, dropped the trailer off at his destination, and now is driving through San Francisco enroute to pick up another trailer to bring somewhere else? Who knows.

Russell gets caught up in this crazy conflict in Chinatown involving a Chinese prince/crime lord. It seems that the prince/crime lord have kidnapped Russell's friend's fiancee--a beautiful green-eyed Chinese woman. It seems that the a green-eyed woman is the key to removing an ancient curse that keeps the prince/crimelord immortal and flesh-less. Kim Cattrall appears as a green-eyed American woman who I guess just lives in Chinatown and knows all about the conflict. Cattrall's green eyes end up attracting the interest of the Chinese prince/crime lord who decides to kidnap her as well, thinking that he can offer her up as tribute to the god who placed the ancient curse on him, then the green-eyed Chinese woman will live out her life as his unwilling wife.

This movie was ridiculous and absurd in all the best ways-- lots of extended gymnastics tumbling scenes, overly long airborne sword fights, people jumping much higher than they should be able to, a monster with an eyeball on the end of his tongue, Russell getting his boot knife stuck in a guy's body, blinding lasers coming out of people's mouths, lightning strikes emanating from people's bodies... this movie has everything.
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