1/10
Ain't missin' this at all
5 February 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Now I know why I had never heard of this film back in the 1980s when I was always at the movies: it misses on almost every count.

It is painful to watch John Malkovich trying to play a maladroit roboticist, who wobbles between irascibility and cluelessness. The attempt at physical comedy is waaay over the top, demonstrating again that comedians are good at drama, but dramatic actors are seldom good at comedy. Of course, being saddled with a blond hairdo that does not go with either of the geek or the android might have added to problems in the performance. We should see a sweet geek who nonetheless is gradually revealed as someone who is mystified by emotions, to offset his creation, who despite being programmed, is capable of knowing & expressing his feelings.

Ann Magnuson never manages to hit the target, including in the opening sequence where she is shaving her legs and underarms and applying makeup as she rushes into her ad agency. There is never any crackle to the character; the performance is everywhere leaden with earnestness. During her scenes with Glenn Headley, it was plain that Headley, who delivers during her few scenes, ought to have been cast in the lead female role.

The director just had no idea how to make any of these scenes work. At two hours, the film is agonizingly long; no scene propels viewers into the next scene. Maybe it was the success of "Desperately Seeking Susan," which surrounded Roseanne Arquette with a wonderful cast, and was buoyed by Madonna's pop celebrity, that got the director the job.

The film does manage to hit the charm of its promise at the end, when you realize that it's the human, Dr Peters, who goes into space, and is glad to be away from humanity, while the humanized android realizes his dream of love, and this was due to Malkovich's acting, so painfully burdened throughout the long, long, long slog through the rest of it.
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