Review of Land of Doom

OK, where to begin? First, this movie is boring. In the first half an hour the 'heroine', who has perfect teeth and hair, but never gets nude at all, not even a breast-a great disappointment to a spiceless film, says, "Don't Touch Me!", "I do things my way!" "I'm better off alone", blah, blah, blah. At least twenty times. The 'hero', who also has neat hair and teeth, is incredibly bland. He doesn't want to kill anyone-not even the bad guys or cannibals. These feebs are looking for 'paradise', a place where the world can be rebuilt. Oh, did I mention the unseen nuclear war? Well there was one. We see nothing of it. No destroyed cities, nothing. But they do make friends with a guy who speaks with an italian accent and he's friends with some knock-off Jawas. I'm not kidding. They look like Jawas. It seems the two main characters fall in love and the italian guy goes off with the Jawas. I'm not sure since by then my brain was numb. Did I mention the motorcycle that never runs out of gas? Or that in the end, they all run away after the main bad guy turns up still alive? Please, don't watch this waste of time. You'll thank me.