Expend4bles (2023)
5/10
I'm sorry, Sly. I loved the first three
27 September 2023
..... I was underwhelmed. I wasn't expecting much and it delivered on that. Tony Jaa was one of the best parts of the film. As a character.

The action is what you'd expect. Fists, feet, guns, knives and explosions it was however more visceral than the previous three and whereas I like action, I don't care for violence. When it feels like it's more about shock and less about adrenaline, I check out mentally.

The humor was more juvenile than I care for also. Not all of it. But a few key moments was like "Who wrote this, Judd Apatow?" (the answer is no. Actually very decent writers including ones who wrote Equilibrium.) The cast was all over the place. I get adding Iwo Kuwais and Tony Jaa. But 50 cent, some random Spanish kid, some odd Asian chick and some second random bad guy just don't fit into who this series was for and about. And it's GLARING what they should've done different.

They added Andy Garcia which is a nice old blood touch but come on. He's not Mel Gibson, JCVD, Bruce Willis, etc level .

Megan Fox ... I really like her. I've liked her in many things. But... Not this. Her intro is so shrill it's difficult to care about her later. And she's under about 15lbs of makeup. And you still wonder about more established female action heroes that could've been used. Charlize Theron? Scarlett Johanson? Kim Basinger? Uma Thurman. IDK.

I kinda don't care if they make a part 5 and as hard as this bombed, I'm sure they probably won't.
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