Bad Things (2023)
1/10
Painfully Boring
9 March 2024
If this little gem is any indication, Shudder seems to have switched from producing horror films to producing horrific ones. The meager attempts to be scary in this script are bits lifted from other movies. Unfortunately these bits are so poorly directed they only serve to stir up unfavorable comparisons to the originals they were heisted from. Instead of the spooky little girls of The Shining, the hall of this film's hotel is haunted by two lithe young women jogging in place, looking like rejects from a failed aerobics program. Texas Chainsaw Massacre is also represented, and for more than one reason I wish the chainsaw wielding actor was wearing a mask like Leatherface.

Production values are rock bottom. A potentially creepy location is completely wasted on the milksop screenplay. Why there's a "production designer" listed in the credits is a total head scratcher. I would love to know what exactly they did to transform what appears to be a recently vacated hotel into what appears to be a recently vacated hotel. But maybe I'm wrong. Despite one character describing the place as "the Four Seasons of the 80s" it looks more like a Target shopping center converted into a Holiday Inn.

The costumes are a mixed bag ranging from ridiculous to hot. In one scene an actress appears wearing what can only be described as a clown gown ripped straight from the pages of a Zippy the Pinhead comic book. Earlier in the film we're treated to the same trans actress prancing through the halls in her underpants. We also get Molly Ringwold in a scorching red ensemble, looking absolutely delicious for a woman of any age.

If you're a fan of Shudder's agenda, which puts more emphasis on promoting progressive social values than providing scares, you might enjoy this tale of young LGBTQ+ lovers and friends wasting time in an empty hotel. Just sprinkle some No-Doz on yiour popcorn.
0 out of 0 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed