Screen Media. A Chicken Soup for the Soul Entertainment Company. Evolution Pictures. Ntropic Films. Head Gear. Blood Red Films. Metrol Technology.
So let me guess: without all their contributions, this movie wouldn't have been made or released, correct?
The movie starts out with Jennifer Love Hewitt vandalizing a tree in public with her foster mother's full approval.
Is that Demi Moore?
The hoodlums consult a transvestite witch doctor who grifts money for false prophecies and boldface lies. The con artist in drag summons up a demon, and it comes in the form of a fly.
I find that whenever I buy a cooked chicken from the store and take it home 10 times out of 10, a big blow-fly will be in the house. I often wonder if they're spawned from the actual cooked product, meaning we're importing the devil into our houses.
Sad days for horror movies when mainstream actress Mena Suvari has to appear in a straight-to-video movie.
After biting the finger off the tranny tarot reader, we jump three months later and find ourselves on Neibolt Street, where the leper tormented Eddie. "I know, Eddie, it's you I'm worried about, big boy."
Beth and Elanor seem to be the stars of this movie. They'd look more at home in a Lifetime drama instead.
The start of the movie is in a quagmire as two chicks sit around with airy lines to deliver like, "You're you; you're a good person." It hasn't even detailed to the viewer what we're in for, just some backpackers not granted a visa to go overseas, or something.
How am I supposed to review this movie when I don't even know what the hell is going on?
A poorly explained start to the movie sees two sisters of the divine ya ya hood all fragrant-free from the comfortable wings that make horseback riding and playing tennis a more enjoyable experience.
I had to take an oral exam in front of the entire class in year 10, and the teacher hit me with the question, "What do teenage girls do after they leave school at three?" I stood there, dumfounded, not having a clue what to say.
Elanor takes a job babysitting a dormant demon.
We meet Suvari, who's subscribed to Little House on the Prairie and sells Mormon literature in her spare time. In old age, a lot of ladies become servants to a god or demon, depending on season availability. Suvari's looking every bit the Amish farmhand.
Sitting around with nothing to do, the movie pretty much dillydallies still making its mind up in which direction it wants to go in. Well done, director; you've made a movie without putting much thought or direction into it.
As if this old bag wouldn't be committed to some palliative care service in the condition she's in.
The movie just plods from one intrigue to another. Vinyl records playing by themselves, hands crawling out of mouths, creepy kids in the distance, phone ringing jump scares, rock messages thrown at windows, dropped broken glass - none of it is explained what any of it means. You're fishing, director, fella
It might help Elanor if she turned on a light instead of getting around in the gloomy dark.
Apparently the old bag she's babysitting is deceased. For all your zombie day care center needs, just call Elanor.
One hour and ten minutes into this movie, and no one's been killed yet. I think one would be better off watching 'The Conjuring' instead.
Elanor finds Laurie Strode's 2018 trapdoor to the Evil Dead fruit cellar and discovers all this Slipknot material and other cryptic garbage down there. In a small world, it turns out her father was in a relationship with the dead lady, and at one hour and 14 minutes, I want out of this nightmare.
Mena Suvari kills Beth, and I think Suvari's role would have been better reserved for Yancy Butler. Any points generated for this movie's rating will be for Beth, who was easy on the eye.
Hannibal Lecter already did the Ed Gein face-wearing business with Lt. Boyle, so there is no originality there.
Some Venom creature shows up at the end, and I question why it didn't show up at the beginning, where it could have done more damage, instead of reducing its rampage to the last few minutes of the film. Whatever it is, it's a cross between Groot and broccoli.
Why didn't Venom catch Elanor off guard when she took the job on day one and do her in then?
What any of the hanging victims in the hospital mean at the end, I couldn't care less about.
A movie for the girls. Watch 'Bridesmaids' first, then this one if you're having a hen night. And don't forget to be fragrantly fresh.
So let me guess: without all their contributions, this movie wouldn't have been made or released, correct?
The movie starts out with Jennifer Love Hewitt vandalizing a tree in public with her foster mother's full approval.
Is that Demi Moore?
The hoodlums consult a transvestite witch doctor who grifts money for false prophecies and boldface lies. The con artist in drag summons up a demon, and it comes in the form of a fly.
I find that whenever I buy a cooked chicken from the store and take it home 10 times out of 10, a big blow-fly will be in the house. I often wonder if they're spawned from the actual cooked product, meaning we're importing the devil into our houses.
Sad days for horror movies when mainstream actress Mena Suvari has to appear in a straight-to-video movie.
After biting the finger off the tranny tarot reader, we jump three months later and find ourselves on Neibolt Street, where the leper tormented Eddie. "I know, Eddie, it's you I'm worried about, big boy."
Beth and Elanor seem to be the stars of this movie. They'd look more at home in a Lifetime drama instead.
The start of the movie is in a quagmire as two chicks sit around with airy lines to deliver like, "You're you; you're a good person." It hasn't even detailed to the viewer what we're in for, just some backpackers not granted a visa to go overseas, or something.
How am I supposed to review this movie when I don't even know what the hell is going on?
A poorly explained start to the movie sees two sisters of the divine ya ya hood all fragrant-free from the comfortable wings that make horseback riding and playing tennis a more enjoyable experience.
I had to take an oral exam in front of the entire class in year 10, and the teacher hit me with the question, "What do teenage girls do after they leave school at three?" I stood there, dumfounded, not having a clue what to say.
Elanor takes a job babysitting a dormant demon.
We meet Suvari, who's subscribed to Little House on the Prairie and sells Mormon literature in her spare time. In old age, a lot of ladies become servants to a god or demon, depending on season availability. Suvari's looking every bit the Amish farmhand.
Sitting around with nothing to do, the movie pretty much dillydallies still making its mind up in which direction it wants to go in. Well done, director; you've made a movie without putting much thought or direction into it.
As if this old bag wouldn't be committed to some palliative care service in the condition she's in.
The movie just plods from one intrigue to another. Vinyl records playing by themselves, hands crawling out of mouths, creepy kids in the distance, phone ringing jump scares, rock messages thrown at windows, dropped broken glass - none of it is explained what any of it means. You're fishing, director, fella
It might help Elanor if she turned on a light instead of getting around in the gloomy dark.
Apparently the old bag she's babysitting is deceased. For all your zombie day care center needs, just call Elanor.
One hour and ten minutes into this movie, and no one's been killed yet. I think one would be better off watching 'The Conjuring' instead.
Elanor finds Laurie Strode's 2018 trapdoor to the Evil Dead fruit cellar and discovers all this Slipknot material and other cryptic garbage down there. In a small world, it turns out her father was in a relationship with the dead lady, and at one hour and 14 minutes, I want out of this nightmare.
Mena Suvari kills Beth, and I think Suvari's role would have been better reserved for Yancy Butler. Any points generated for this movie's rating will be for Beth, who was easy on the eye.
Hannibal Lecter already did the Ed Gein face-wearing business with Lt. Boyle, so there is no originality there.
Some Venom creature shows up at the end, and I question why it didn't show up at the beginning, where it could have done more damage, instead of reducing its rampage to the last few minutes of the film. Whatever it is, it's a cross between Groot and broccoli.
Why didn't Venom catch Elanor off guard when she took the job on day one and do her in then?
What any of the hanging victims in the hospital mean at the end, I couldn't care less about.
A movie for the girls. Watch 'Bridesmaids' first, then this one if you're having a hen night. And don't forget to be fragrantly fresh.