User Reviews

'If we'd grown up in Australia, BMX Bandits would have been our version of The Goonies' quote, fame director Quentin Tarantino. While, I don't agree with that statement by Tarantino. I have to somewhat agree with him in one thing. It was indeed, a fun nostalgia trip! Made before the X-Games was a thing and way after 1972's motorcycle documentary, "On Any Sunday'. "BMX Bandit' was a movie that really try to capitalize on the Australians' BMX craze which took off in the early 1980s. Made in the middle of the whole Ozploitation New Wave movement (late 1970s to late 1980s). 'BMX Bandits' is a 1983 kid film that, probably most famous now, as one of the films that a young Nicole Kidman, starred in, before her big breakthrough role, in 1989's 'Dead Calm'. Directed by Brian Trenchard-Smith, the film tells the story of three young BMX riders, P.J. (Angelo D'Angelo), Goose (James Lugton), and Judy (Nicole Kidman), being entangled with a group of bank robbers, when they stole a carton of stolen police walkie-talkies, the gangsters were using to loot. Without spoiling the movie, too much, the first thing, I notice about this film is the really bad pacing issues. For a film about BMX bikes, you really don't see much of it, until the climax of the film. Most of the other parts of the film, has the teens doing a lot of illegal acts like stealing fish traps, vandalism, and other crimes to try to get money to get their bikes, fix, after a clichés obligatory nasty, nameless fat bully (Brian Sloman), cause them to wreck, their bikes with shopping carts, yet not their bodies. Second off, the movie has, this, long pointless really, out of place, horror scene, where the bad guys are chasing the teenagers, through a dark cemetery with scary looking masks. Was this movie, originally supposed to be a horror movie? It really seem, so! The character talk about scary films, way too much. It's like this movie didn't really had some sort of a identify, during the writing period, until they decided to go with the BMX theme, late in production. It's no wonder, why this movie was retitled, 'Short Wave' in America. After all, most of the film, has them, playing with the walkie talkies than riding their bikes. The movie is also, often criticized for having an odd unbalance mixer of Aussie slapstick style comedy and adult-driven action. The police in this film, are absolutely useless, and really doesn't do much, besides, play background chitchat and the rolling shenanigans of the Freddy Mercury and Billy Idol, knock offs, bad guys, Whitey (David Argue) and Moustache (John Ley), during the second and third parts of the film, really doesn't match up with the intense opening part of the film, which makes them, looking like a seriously threat. It's really hard to believe, these were the same guys that were in an intense gun-fight with police, a few minutes ago, during a bank heist, and now, they are, now getting pounded by bunch of preteen kids with bags of flour and soap bubbles. It get weirder for them, as the film had a memorable moment, where the BMX bikers, escape down the Manly Waterworks water slides, complete with BMX bikes, with the villains, coming after them. It's really, jarring, when you think, about it, because you would, think the bank robbers would be smarter than this. Anyways, that climatic silly chase through all of Sydney's stunning location really does go on forever. It got really tiresome, after a while. While the slapstick humor, didn't live up to my standards, at least, the weird dialogue jokes, did. The film had a lot of great one-liners from the three appealing young leads, even if their thick Australian accent, was hard to hear, at times. Their delivery can be a bit bizarre, because, the fact, that I'm American, born in the 1980s. I just wish, I knew, some of the often dated words or foreign slangs they were, often bantering. Who knew, that a trolley mean shopping cart in Australian English? I didn't! Anyways, most of the jokes were harmless and goofy in a fun kind of a way. Decked out in their bright color-coded flashy neon outfits, you really can tell, this was a 1980s film. After all, Nicole Kidman had big ratty red hair perm, seem to want to eat up, the scenery and the boys are often seem, wearing really short shorts. While, their acting was somewhat alright; I have to say, their bikes skills is a bit questionable, as three top BMX bike experts had to be, brought in, to replace the actors, during action scenes. It's sad, that the stunts are all performed with over-dramatized slow motion camera movement and bad sound effects. It really took me, out of the movie. Moreover, Nicole Kidman was doubled by an 18-year-old boy who wore a wig. It was really odd to watch, to watch her character played by a stunt man, do halfpipes ramp with the song, 'I see Boys' by Petra Gaffney playing in the background. Indeed, most the movie's music choices, don't really match, the tone of the film, at all. 'I'm Ready to Fly' (Kangaroo Hop) by the band, 'The Papers', is probably the worst. I had no clue, how the lyrics of the song, relate to what happening on film. That song is torturous. Overall: While, BMX Bandits offers an amusing good times to '80s freestyle bike culture with some bawdy humor and adventure. This movie is incredibly inferior to the 1986's film, 'Rad' in every way. It's good for a one time watch.

A trio of teen BMXers(including a young Nicole Kidman)find walkie talkies left underwater by two crooks(David Argue and John Ley)and decide to sell them in the hopes of getting new bikes and body gear. Communicating on a forbidden wavelength picked up by the police who must apprehend them, the trio might have a chance to get a new BMX rider park if they can help the cops capture the criminals wanted for the robbery seen at the beginning of the film. Most of the movie has Kidman and male teen pals, Lugton and D'Angelo evading Argue and Ley who pursue them in a car and by foot to no avail. Director Brian Trenchard-Smith(Dead End Drive-In)gets a lot of mileage out of beautiful Sidney, Australia, shooting all over(and through)the city using all sorts of flashy camera angles to depict bike riding in an alluring manner. If you are a fan of bike stunts, there are many to salivate over, including a very lengthly race through the city where the teens find constant ways to avoid Argue and Ley who pretend to be detectives(which doesn't fool Kidman, who they actually have cornered and eventually kidnap not once but twice). Like "The Goonies" after this, "BMX Bandits" features teen kids outsmarting bumbling criminals who aren't very bright and look foolish often. Would go nicely in a double feature with "Rad", except "BMX Bandits" is a bit more exciting since Trenchard-Smith is allowed to shoot anywhere he wants to in a massive city and does so with a lot of flair. The bikers ride through crowded streets, through a mall, even down a water slide for Petesake with doofuses Argue and Ley often falling over or running into people and debris. It's also easy to side with such likable teenagers as Kidman, D'Angelo and Lugton who are considered a nuisance by traffic cops who find them annoyances since they ride through areas they probably shouldn't. The storyline is fluff, all the fuss over a cache of walkie talkies, but this isn't some sort of serious crime drama about stolen drugs stashed away, recovered by kids who are in turn chased by a gang of ruthless hoods, it's a teen adventure, mere whimsy/escapism.

Terribly bland, predictable kids flick about a trio of bmx teens who stumble across a stolen stash and have a run-in with crooks and cops as a result.

Produced solely to cash in on the bicycle moto-cross craze that swept the world in the early eighties, script is silly and corny throughout and will entertain only very young bmx enthusiasts. Of course for them there is plenty to look at, with the main chase sequence taking up what seems to be half of the film.

Apart form the bmx action attraction there is nothing else on show. The cops are dumb, the crooks even dumber, and the film is just plain simple over all. Notable perhaps for the fact that famous Aussie cinematographer John Seale was behind the camera, and that Nicole Kidman made a rather forgettable start here.

Saturday, July 13, 996 - Video

Our Squadron has embarked on a most triumphant adventure, to ascertain the best-worst film of the 1980s. After a vast amount of study, and many efficacious screenings, we fell upon an IMDb endorsement…BMX Bandits. While none of us have ever seen this film, and judging solely on user reviews, the movie cover, and pictures from various scenes, we resolved to give it a viewing.

The opening scene produced smiles to everyone's faces with anticipation of the potential astounding phenomenon that was to come. Those same smiles metamorphosed to looks of bewilderment as this same opening scene dragged on for five, nay ten minutes. Not long after, the initial chase scene began…and never ended.

Aside from the unquestionably awful acting, the requisite for a translator to decipher the dialogue, mediocre bike stunts, unequivocally incompetent bad guys, and absolutely no plot whatsoever…never mind, it was just horrifying anyway you look at it. The only redeeming…sorry, I did it again, there was no redeeming quality. It was just that vile.

Not many weeks before, we screened the film "Rad" and were mystified by its pure, unalloyed cinematography and tremendous BMX stunts. I deem it was a mistake, a most heinous mistake, to think that this movie could even come close to paralleling it. Some users compared "BMX Bandits" to the "Goonies." We all laughed and celebrated the scenes of our young heroes braving the copious traps set forth before them and relished in the memorable characters and musical compositions that would leave us singing these songs for days…wait, sorry, it didn't have any of that.

When the credits finally completed rolling across the screen, I rose from my chair and gently flicked the switch to the lights above. The quiet hum they produced broke the silence that seemed to linger. What I saw next will forever be seared into my soul. Grown men, warriors who have braved numerous attacks and survived the harshest of environments were broken. Three lay on the floor, crouched in the fetal position, shaking and crying out for their mothers far away. One was bent over the nearby garbage can, emptying the contents of his stomach in an effort to cleanse what he had witnessed. Another simply sat in his chair as his bowels cried "no more" and emptied itself onto the ground. Yet the majority of us simply stared ahead, deep in thought. It wasn't in disbelief of what we had just forced ourselves to observe, but rather in self-reflection of how the deepest part of us will all be forever changed.

Even though we are fighting in Afghanistan, and any time away from reality is valued more than any wealth, none of us can get those 88 minutes back…none of us. After the film we made a pact, once this review was complete, and submitted to you good people, we would never speak of it again.

This is a bizarre slice of Ozploitation directed by Brian Trenchard-Smith. Low budget exploitation films have always cashed-in on trends whether that be roller skating (Rollerball, Derby), Disco (The Disco Godfather, Saturday Night Fever), Hip Hop and its culture (Rappin', Electric Boogaloo), Punk (Rock N Roll High School, Who Killed Bambi?), 90s (MTV-style) Youth culture (Wayne's World, SFW, Bill & Ted) ... I could go on. So why not BMX bikes? Due to this film being made in 1983 and much like the aforementioned 80s Rappin' and Electric Boogaloo; it looks dated by today's standards. Neon pink trousers!

The film is basically a family friendly action comedy. The BMX Bandits accidentally end up foiling some bank robbers. Like a lot of kid-friendly action films the bad guys are reduced to comedy (see also Cop and a Half, Home Alone, The Mask). You don't want truly nasty b*stards in a kid's comedy. Family films in the 90s got a bit darker (Mario Bros, The Mask based on a violent comic, Goosebumps), but this is a very bright colourful film with sill slapstick and not really much violence. Other than bad guys waving shotguns, knives and bats around there's not much to object to. The star is some nice photography of early 80s Sydney, which has since become much more developed, touristy and absolutely chocka with skyscrapers.

The film is notable for three reasons: a very early appearance of teenage Nicole Kidman - no wonder Hollywood became interested as every line is delivered with ease, although she doesn't really have screen presence in this. The film was much sought after "cult classic" and was traded on VHS until it got a DVD release. Thirdly the action scenes are by an experienced stunt team and features some incredible driving stunts for the 900K budget. Not a must see, but fun enough.

This is one of the few Nicole Kidman films you would let your kid watch. What could be more cool than riding a bicycle with walkie-talkies hanging out with a kid named Angelo D'Angelo? And then you discover your dad's Playboys and its all over. In this film some kids discover a case of walkie-talkies that belong to a group of robbers planning a job. The police want them too as the kids are stepping all over their police band. Can a group of kids on bikes thwart the robbers and the police? Ho-hum. Nothing like scenes of kids riding bicycles, popping wheelies, and out smarting adults.

I am not sure kids today would even be interested in this film. And if you're a perv who stalks Nicole Kidman, you might want to pass on this one too unless you are also into bicycle seats. This was made before Kidman could act.

Parental Guide: No f-bombs, sex, or nudity.