(2004 Video)

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Plenty to dislike
lor_24 May 2016
Warning: Spoilers
Robby D.'s hackwork assignments bore me; this earlier effort fails to rise to the level of a hack's output -it's terrible and more a provocation than a video.

Start with the title: a meaningless phrase, not the implication of Eugene Levy or someone leading kids in slapstick/sex/bad instrumental practice. Star Barrett Blade is a guitarist, and perhaps a sycophant might find the video's content campy, but that's as close as we get.

Inane action resembles a mainstream stoner comedy but without the intellectual depth and breadth of such an undertaking. Barrett humps his main squeeze Avy Scott in the lengthy opening scene, more a desecration of the great Avy (looking good) than erotic entertainment.

After his facial is deposited, Barrett goes to work in a demeaning Chicken outfit - his earnings as a band guitarist hardly enough to live on. His dumb roommate Jay Ashley, who makes Steve Zahn or whoever you like in A movies look intelligent, is meant as a comic foil but basically just a dick with human attached taking up space.

Key set-up scene has Barrett knocked unconscious by the car door opened by Jay, and here comes my necessary Spoiler to continue discussing the video.

SPOILER:

The rest of the action is later revealed to be "only a dream", as Barrett remains unconscious for the duration due to the bump on his head. Audience is likely unconscious for a different reason.

His non-adventures are mainly sex filler, plus the gimmick of him picking up his large metal guitar case but finding it filled with $500,000 instead of his trusty axe. Writer-director Robby presents one of the least interesting variations on the theme of "what to do with found loot" ever filmed -lack of imagination is truly astounding here. His roommate and a ne'er-do-well acquaintance both steal a handful of money (say $1000 or two) from the case, and never do the expected consequences of rightful owners (Mafia?, whatever) showing up to retrieve the dough occur. It's a MacGuffin in search of a reason to exist.

Late in the film a young Stormy before she became a Daniels is on hand to provide big boobs and humping, but she reads her lines with disinterest, swallowing many a syllable and a talent scout watching this junker as an audition tape would have written her off as just a bland Jenna imitator.

I made it to the end, with the closing credits accompanied by the Chicken suit guy (whether it's Blade or someone else inside the costume) dancing around, playing air guitar and doing fancy splits, meant to be rollicking and funny. Simply a disgraceful, insulting time-waster.
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