User Reviews

Man, a Super-8 looking movie made in 1996 that's supposed to look like a scuzzy 1971 Italian film? Yes, that's pretty much exactly the kind of movie that I'm looking for. And sure, the music is over the dialogue and nothing really makes sense, but if I worried about films making sense, I would have stopped this site long ago.

I mean, a beatnik poet spells out the title of the film and all of the dialogue is way off from the peope speaking it and there are big stretches where nothing happens, but hey - it's basically an American crew trying to make something that hasn't been made for a quarter of a century.

I don't know how good the rest of writer/director Joseph F. Parda's films are but with titles like Evil Streets and Machines of Love and Hate, they are wonderous if only in my imagination.

So yeah - it's about an artist obsessed with death getting killed, his body disappearing and his brother searching for it through a sexually twisted underground. You know - what we call Tuesday around here.

This is just in case those of you who shop at Diabolik are going here before purchasing this on DVD and are going by the other reviews, here's an accurate review of the movie. I haven't listened to all of the commentary by the director and producer/star but they call this their tribute to the "giallo" my favorite eurotrash movie. Filmed on Long Island and what looks like some Manhattan apartments, it's a long way from Italy except maybe for some obvious scenes that are kind of "borrowed" (and i say that loosely) from much much better films. I'm not trying to criticize the quality but it's very obvious they had a very low budget to work with and the film looks like a bad VHS transfer (don't think it is it just looks that way there's a disclaimer at the beginning about flaws in the film etc ) with some truly awful sound (there are places where the music pretty much drowns out the dialog so you have to crank up the 5.1 hoping to hear what they're saying). There's a woman right at the beginning who is killed in the shower by a black masked killer clothed all in black with black gloves and a hat right out of any giallo made. This is fine but then the plot begins and as you watch the movie you come to find out her killing seems to have nothing to do with the plot whatsoever. And what a plot! I think these guys have much more in common with Ed Wood than Mario Bava or Dario Argento. Now I'm a big fan of Wood but he crafted a much better film than they have and the comparison is only that the script is the kind of loopy thing Wood wrote in the fifties. Hardly the stuff of giallos. An artist who paints some of the worst paintings ever seen conspired with his insane suicidal wife to be "killed" in order to make his paintings more valuable! Then he goes around (I think its him but then it could be his wife or the art critic- they throw her in as a possible murderess for no understandable reason)slashing up different people who have his art in order to take his paintings back! Anyone getting this?! A great many of the lines spoken are truly incredible and I have to quote a couple. The most Woodian character is a police detective who says (in true Wood fashion): "Give---me---a description and I'll send out an A (pause) P (pause) B. You just have to hear it! Then there's the star saying: " I told you 14 times....." ( as opposed to 13 or 12?).Most of the actors have wonderful Neeew Yawk accents that give this a kind of Hershell Gordon Lewis flavor. Imagine "Have you ever had an.....Egyptian Feast! in Long Islandese and you've got it. Anyway, I don't think this was meant as a comedy (although after the beatnik scene I'm really not sure) but if you're looking for horror this only qualifies if you're looking for so bad it's good I need to be high to enjoy omg I'm horrified I paid for this. Don't expect an American Bird with the Crystal Plumage!